F*cked up Fairy Tale?

Once upon a time (shut yer pie hole piggy boy thats a great intro ok not, your still gonna shut up tho) there was an extremely handsome young prince named Dartanion. (three muskateers giggle giggle no Tammy not the CHOCOLATE bar what ARE you thinkin =) He was the kings favorite son, so one day the king called him into his court.
Dartanion: “Yes your Majesty?�
King: “Please call me Father… my son
Dartanion: “Ok Your Maj… Father� (seen that a thousand times)
King: “Please sit down.�
Dartanion: “I don’t understand what is this�-
King: “You were always my favorite son�.
Dartanion: “Dude I’m your only son!�
King: “F*ck You!�
Dartanion:�Suck my WHAT?!�
King: “BALLS! YOU DIRTY LITTLE…� (oops ill keep it rated G… yeah right)
King: “Sorry I got carried away there.�
Dartanion: “Go on…� although he thought: you retard
King: “As I was saying theres a big friggin dragon outside, and I just soiled myself therefore go kill it.� Hope it slobbers acid on your face. he thinks to himself
Dartanion: You kill it. You lazy fat little bug.
King: “I aint little!�
Dartanion: “Lola says different..� HEHEHEHEHEHEHEHE
King: “Whos Lola?�
Dartanion: “My donkey.� Snicker snicker… followed by Dartanion falling off his chair and rolling around laughing like a fish outta water…

This went on for about 2 hours more, and then both of them fell asleep

*Raucous cheering from the inane puppets in the castle*

They apologized, got mad at each other again traded insults some more, then finally Dartanion agreed to kill the dragon if he got a the fair maiden
Selina’s…………………………..
Solid gold toilet seat. (HAHA you thought I was gonna say hand in marriage… I told you this is a F-ed up fairy tale!)

The noble Dartanion ventures forth into the lair of the dragon, and says:
“Ho there vile beast I shall slayeth thy hide, and use your teath for my earings!
Dragon: What are you gay or something?!
Dartanion: NOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!
Dragon: Whatever
Dartanion: I am not I swear. Look here is a picture of my future wife Selina!
Dragon: That’s a crapper seat!
Dartanion: Son of a Nut Cracker!
Dragon: Problems?
Dartanion: No I just have a lot of stuff in here…
Dragon:… Is that a purse?
Dartanion: WTF it’s a man bag!!!! All the rage you know.
Dragon: Cough Gay Cough.
Dartanion: Suck my what?!
Dragon: AND THERE IT IS YOUR GAY! HOMOOOOOOO
Dartanion: I DIDN’T MEAN THAT! IT’S A JEST YOU PERVERT IGUANA MONSTER!
Dragon: And I like eating burning plastic!
Dartanion: HUH?
Dragon: Never mind.
Dartanion: Oh here it is OOPS…. OH SH*T!
DRAGON: Who is that? Looks more like Mr. Sneider to me. Haha that’s a guy(sort of)… you are gay dirty pervert.
Dartanion: That’s my brother! I swear.
Dragon: Dude you don’t have any kin, except daddy dearest you little spoiled pervert gay brat!
Dartanion: Fine I admit it I am queer as a 3 dollar bill, and Mr. Sneider is my Bitch! So what?! Enough talk its time to kill you bloody dragon.

The evil dragon blows fire at the helpless Dartanion who immediately raises his shield that is constructed of the impenetrable Mithril steel. The fire reflects off the shield, and is in a direct course for the dragon. In a flash the dragon ducks, and the fire soars past in a blaze of fiery glory. Just then Mr. Sneider in a femmy black tank top, and purple shorts with bananas on them (DO NOT ASK IF YOU VALUE YOUR SANITY I BEG OF THEE DON’T ASK FORGET ABOUT SNEIDER’S BANNANAS!!!!) with sandals comes hoppin in swinging both arms left and right while skipping gay gesture all around that are disgustingly wrong when applied to Gay-Sneido and enters the cave. And gets fried totally burnt to a LESS-THEN-NORMAL revolting blob of semi-nuclear radioactive sh*t-crap.

*Raucous cheering from the inane puppets in the castle*

Just then Michael Jackson walks in. Gay giggle escapes while he mirrors the previous moves of his Luvie Duvie PrinciPAL.

Michael: “Hey Snidy poo. Is the cave empty, lets get down to buisn…�

Dragon: Who in the name of fuzzy lumpkins man dinga are you… Sneiders Dumpling apparently hahahah!
Dartanion: Mr. Sneider was cheating on me with YOU!
Michael: He is mine you skank!
Dragon: Your both skanks and you need to die!

The dragon burns both tards to cinders, and eats all three of them… just then he remembers what he ate starts to vomit, and dies…

*Insane cheering from the inane puppets in the castle*

And the king lives happily ever after, and marries Lola(the donkey)… Come on it’s a fairy tale some ones gotta get married!

*Insane cheering from the inane puppets in the castle*

And That’s why I am not allowed back into Disney Land!